I'm gonna wake up eventually from this mixture of nightmares and dreams.  Life has seem to catch up to me.  No more pushing away from what I have been avoiding.  The hospital finally sent me my court date.  I was scared at first but, theirs nothing I can do this time, I cant keep running from my fears.  Court dates have no become a new thing for me.  Two in the same week, never thought I would be so lucky.  So heres so court dates, speeding tickets, hospital bills and to the amazing government that's screwing over we americans behind there great veils.  I'm done with riding this dark carousel that I've been riding oh so frequently, its time to get off and get on with life and take it one breath at a time.